VIA BARSATOOL: First of all, I’d like to keep soccer as far the fuck away from hockey as humanly possible. That’s not to say I don’t enjoy soccer every 4 years when the World Cup rolls around. And that I don’t appreciate the skill it takes to play the game. With that being said, the last thing I need in my life is for those flopping pussies to be anywhere near a sheet of ice. We already have the Montreal Canadiens for that.
Flopping concerns aside, I think ice soccer has tons of potential. Not for a sport I’d watch on tv or anything. But you round up the boys on a Friday or Saturday and you can have yourselves a day. I’m trying to figure out if this is a game you could toss back a few Molson’s while playing. If you’re playing on foot, then absolutely not. You’re already falling down enough as is. Just imagine running around out there after gassing a few on the bench before your shift. But if you’re out there on skates? I don’t see why not. But now we’re running into a separate issue where you’re playing a sport that requires the players to kick around sharp ass blades attached to the bottom of their feet. But that’s what insurance is for.
I guess what I’m trying to say here is that the jury is still out on ice soccer. A “don’t knock it ’till you try it” sort of thing. Could it just end up being a silly little Instagram video? Sure. But could it also end up being something much more? Probably not but maybe. And those are my official thoughts on Ice Soccer. But yeah, let’s start with lacing up some skates first.